And there's the ephipany.....

Life has a funny way of doing things. Life has a funny way of proving things to yourself that you should have known all along. Life has taught me a valuable lesson....

....through "The Inbetweeners Movie"

Yeah I know, weird isn't it?

For those who don't know the plot line (if there is one), it's about 4 english schoolboys who head on a lad's holiday to Greece. Not to put a spoiler on it, but they all get their prospective girls. So happy endings all round. However, one character has me stuck to this film. No it's not Simon (although he is adorable!!) it's Jane. She's the "larger-than-life" character thats ends up with Jay. Now I know that the descripton I used of her probably isn't very nice, but it's not her looks I am describing, it's her personality. She is not the stereotypical woman you would expect to see in a film like this, as she is not as thin as her other friends in this film. But that's the connection between me and her. I consider myself big. My friends constantly say otherwise about me, and I love them for thinking that, but I consider myself big.

Jane throughout the film is badgered by men about her weight. She is called a whale by some very insensitive people, and has all the fat jokes thrown her way. I wouldn't say I get that (well not often anyway) but she deals with them with such attitude that I can only find myself very very VERY much in awe. She amazes me with her repsonses and her "larger-than-life" way of dealing wth them. She pokes fun of herself when others try, finishes their insults off, which rightly pisses them off big time. To basically some it up: She is a legend!

I love her sarcastic attitude towards rude men. She's not afraid to say how she feels and I envy her. Plus, she is confident in her own skin. At one point she is seen in a bikini top and shaul, and in another she is in a bra and knckers running to the ocean. She doesn't care what others think of her, and it amazes me.

And that's when the ephipany happened, as the credits were rolling. I suddently thought "I need to be more like her. I need to take my size as a good thing. There are men out there who would love a woman with curves like mine, men who would love someone to snuggle up against them who loves who they are. Woman who would kill to look as natural as I am." And then it hit me: It's true. I mean i'm not going to start walking round in my bra, or wear a bikini top yet, i'm not that confident, but I can start feeling good about myself. Stop worrying about how much I eat and what others think of me as I eat. I am my own person and if someone doesn't like me for the way I look, well it's their loss.

After all, there is someone out there for everyone, you just have to have the confidence to get out there and fnd them your own way, not by ways others tell you. If a guy likes you for the way you look then don't be afraid to be the whole of yourself, don't hide a part of you away.

I have loved and lost in the past due to my lack of confidence in the way I look and the way I feel about the way I look. But now I am a whole new person. A bigger, better, brighter person.

And thank you Jay. You may be a fictional character but you make us big girls feel beautiful!

H. x