HOWEVER! I AM BACK!
And with a happy and optimistic start....not because I've just finished my second year of uni....what? who said that? hehehehe
I recently found myself reading a blog about a women named Louise who is suffering from Cancer. She was recommended by her husband to start blogging her experiences, and that's what she did, and I must say it brought a tear (well many tears) to my eyes.
If you want a read (bring a hankie) then here is Lou's Story
But it got me thinking about life and everything in between. What if (god forbid) I was in her situation? Would my friends and family react the same way as hers did? Would I be the same as her?
But then another thought popped into my head: no-one acts the same in these sorts of situations. However, nearly everyone comes out the same in the end, which is:
I shall start living in the present. I shall do what makes me happy
And to be honest, I couldn't agree more.
Just over a year ago, I lost my Aunt to cancer. It was a truly awful time, especially as such a horrible disease taking someone who was one of the nicest people you will ever meet. My biggest regret was being at university at the time, and not being able to do anything to help. It all happened so fast.
This spurned my family to become closer, and for my mum to fulfill a dream she's had for many many many years: to buy a B'n'B. I couldn't have been prouder of her, for doing what she wanted to do with her life, and for making herself happy.
However, it has dawned on me that I haven't done the same....So below is a list of things I want to do to make me happy, plus some other stuff that I thought I'd throw in:
- I am fat. Simple as. My BMI tells me I'm over-weight, no point fretting with the facts. But, even though I will try and lose some, I have my whole life to lose it. While I'm at university, I'm going to enjoy myself and my freedom with food...
- I don't go out as much as I would like. Either I'm ill/not in the mood/have deadlines. There's nothing I can do in those cases, but more times I just need to say f*** it! YOLO (as my mate Alice would say)
- I'm too emotional. Now I know you're saying "there's nothing wrong with that". However, when you are walking home crying, you know something needs to change. I won't necessarily stop being emotional at all, I'm not an ice queen, but I will start making changes in my life that stop me from getting that emotional in the first place.
- I'm finally with an amazing guy, and verging on being with him for 6 months....I plan on being with him for a hell of a lot longer, and he does too, which is great!!!
- I'm going home to see my Mum and Dad soon. I plan on giving them the biggest hug of their lives and never EVER letting go....sorry Mum and Dad....
- I want to go back to Essex to see all my wonderful friends, who even though know I no longer live pretty much next door, still treat me as such, and I love them even more for it!
- I want to scream....just really loudly....to just let it all out....all the anger, all the hate, all the stress....everything....
- I want to go see Russell Howard live again....I love him! And Coldplay, they are currently playing on my iPod, and I think they are amazing....
Probably more will get added, but these will do for now....
Live Long and Prosper....
And I really mean it!
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